Unfinn...

Get some green get some green.That's all but dont be mean. Share the green. Be a fean. Its like bad vs. good. Who really knows smoke the green! Enjoy the hearbal bliss. I touch the sky. The air beneath my wings. Yeah im High of the forbiddible hearb of life. the green i mean that people dispise soo deeply. I understand clearly that people die because of the reckless ways of people even if you not using it. they say ist wack. So wat is green then? Good or bad? I have yet to find the answer to that.

No Tittle

Like the one thing that makes me happy I don't even have it anymore. It's crazy when you just feel like you and a person would be soo right for you and they dont want to go that far. Its more to the staory than what im typing but I just dont have the time type it. But damn when it's soo bad that you can't even hang out with them because the person likes you. It's like they are putting me on punnishment or something. The joy is gone and maybe even lost if i can't see her. I only can now just guess of how it would of been. Damn.... Really Thats that slay.... lol... literally. I had to put a joke in there somewhere bc im just too torn up. Damn...

NoOoOoOT Happy.

Damn im soo Miserable in Nc. It's like every time I come back im unhappy and bored out of mind!!! It's nothing down here for me. No relationships that would make me want to stay. It's absolutely nothing that would make me want to stay. I swear after high school im going to take the first flight out of here. You just wouldnt understand the half of it...

Bad Weekend...

This past weekend starting on Friday just was not good! I got super fucked up. Then I found out that one of my friends I call my bro got in a car accident while he was skate boarding. With Tragic injuries with a fractured skull and his brain is bleeding. So I was pretty tore up about that and still am. And on top of that I just lost a cousin like 3weeks ago and I don't want to loose any other people I'm close to. Ad on top of that I have been getting in trouble with every little thing. Like idk WATS my dads deal. Then this weekend I was expressing my feelings to my boyfriend about everything that has been on my mind. I was crying and all it was just a mess! I told him alot of stuff that he was not aware of. But were good now. Since I expressed all my emotions and problems with him I have to get rid of the swag. Which I'm fine with but I'm not sure how I should leave her alone with out it ending an friendship in a bad way. It's also kind of awkward that the old swag knows about her and they are good friends and soo did not know this. So yeah... It's madd awkward. But this helps us become better friends because she's aware of me not having such of Strong feelings for which is good. I found out that one of my co-workers got fired and MIA like no one knows whats up. So uhmm yeah i would like to know what happen to him. This has just been a mess and Kinda Stressed.

थिस वीक

एजेंडा फॉर थे वीक : गेट चेक टुडे (तुएस्दय) थें थें बुय्स नीद इतेम्स लोल
थाट्स अबाउट आईटी रेअल्ली

The Craziest ish has been happining....

To whom ever is reading this.... I don't care if I put you on blast. It's my blog for a reason!

First off the girl like best friend likes me and flirts with me on the low. And I don't like that. Madd awkward. So I told the girl that I like about it and it seems like she don't care or what ever. But what ever. But that shit bothers me though. Like on some real! So I try to avoid her?


Then the girl I like (which you can read previous blogs that I have wrote about her...) Is stuck on this guy. And I'm not going to lie I am jealous. But everything happens for a reason. So maybe the next girl I find is what I'm looking for. (And I'm not saying she wasn't what I was looking for but I guess... she just like dick...) I think I was a Little bit ill about this...

It hurts but oh well the the scab will
heal... - Mii Life IssUEs

Anyways Since I have been working at Adventure Landing dudes have been all on my shit. And I kinda have a problem with it. Like I tell them I Have a boyfriend but they just don't give a fuck. ( Ha! this is ironic i do this with girls that are interested in a boy or have a boyfriend cuz I just don't give a fuck. So anyways...) But yeah maybe I'm to nice to them. Idk I just want guy friends. I mean the only guy I want is the one I have and I'm good with that.

My Cousin Justin Cosby, 21, Dies After Shooting in Kirkland House

Justin was my cousin. I remember when I first moved to North Carolina, I was in the 9th grade and that’s when he was just starting Central University. I always remembered him as a cool guy. Always smiling and always wearing the latest fashions. This was cool because I’m into that myself and by him being my older cuz he made an impression on me. I just remember us chilling and on the computer listening to music talking about school and how it’s easy just do your work and study like he did. (This helped me remember that school isn’t hard.)

It really hurts that I won’t be able to hang out with out my older cuz anymore or get advice from him. It really hurts and, I wish I could be with my family right now. And I still don’t know the whole story about his tragic death.

His sister wrote this about him:

"STATEMENT FROM THE FAMILY OFJUSTIN D. COSBYJune 13, 1987 – May 19, 2009
The immediate and extended family of Justin Cosby is extremely grateful for all of the love and support from friends, neighbors, childhood and college friends, and everyone that has extended support in this trying time. Justin was loved and respected by everyone that he came into contact with, as there as there are so many that have a positive story to tell when speaking of his kind heart, comical ways and loving nature. “The boy with the smile that would always lend a hand” is how so many have referred to him through the hundreds of people that have been to visit with our family over the last couple days. We are still in disbelief of the horror and shock of Justin’s murder. He was not a “hoodlum” or “gangster” - people actually laugh at the thought of him being referred to in that manner.
Justin was a fashion trendsetter, basketball player, student and self-admitted “mama’s boy”. He was looking forward to picking up new studies, furthering his aspirations to become successful and marrying his long-time girlfriend. We know that Justin’s wings will be on our shoulders to help us survive God bringing him home for bigger tasks than he can do here on Earth.
In support of the family, the Justin Cosby Memorial Fund has been established and donations can be received at any Bank of America nationwide.
The Wake will be held on Saturday, May 23 from 3:30 – 4:30pm at The Concord Baptist Church at 190 Warren Avenue (at West Brookline St.) Boston, MA 02116. The Funeral service will immediately follow the Wake at the same location. Justin will be buried in his hometown of Richmond, VA.
Our angel Justin will be missed and will always be in our hearts and memories.
Spokesperson on behalf of the family:Name: Shenita CosbyContact Email: justincosbymemorial@gmail.com"

Ahh-man (Big Sigh...)

Yeah. The worst thing happen to me. The swag has moved on. I'm still trinna deal with it or more like get over it. But I'm not lol. But I don't even know why? I mean I talk to 3 other people but they aren't like her. I don't get the same vibe from them like I do from her. So yeah (Big Sigh...) hopefully one day she'll change her mind and come back... But until then the feelings will linger until they find it's place again.

Make sure you listen to the song :

	Drake - Missin You Remix feat. Trey Songz
	Found at skreemr.com

Updates!!

http://c.brightcove.com/services/viewer/federated_f9/10172910001?isVid=1&publisherID=59121" bgcolor="#FFFFFF" flashVars="videoId=1823771467&playerID=10172910001&domain=embed&" base="http://admin.brightcove.com" name="flashObj" width="486" height="412" seamlesstabbing="false" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowFullScreen="true"swLiveConnect="true" pluginspage="

I haven't blogged in a long min. I have stuff stuff to blog about but I have never got around to the computer. Anyways updates on me. Things are changing with certain addictions. I will be leawaying (if that is a word...) of my addiction(s)((?)) We will see how that will work. Looks like I dont have anything else to write.... Wait yeah I do.

So, yesterday my brother and my ex-stepmom called me yesterday. Then we were talking about her Mothersday... I was being nice. Anyways she was telling me how her mom is in a nursing home because she can't take care of herself anymore because she has cancer. ( I felt bad and still do because no-one likes to see their loved ones suffering and they can't do anything about it) And I could feel the pain in her voice. Then i really felt bad. :[

So my dad comes in the room. And he's being and asshole for no reason. Like all up in my mouth asking me what were talking about and ish'... I was getting annoyed. Like even though I strongly don't like her I do care about the other people in her family that have shown me niceness? Basicly I thought there was no reason for my dad acting an ass when I was talking to her.

Why..?

I'm having issues like always. It feels like I'm searching for something (of course I know that something) and I find something similar to it but it does not satisfy me. And I'm the type of person that wants things to be right when it's happening to me or when I want it to be special...... Mhm.. Yeah emptiness is all I'm trying say. Don't like it... Trinna fight it and just cope with what I have. :-/

This Guy Named Ja' IS Giving me Compitition....

I just found out that I'm a jealous person when it comes to me sharing someone I want to start some thing with. I feel like I'm winning but the other person still has a chance to get back in the game. I'm not sure if that makes sense or not but its true. But I don't want him in it at all. I don't even want him thinking he has a chance. Mean but true. That's what you got to do when you like someone fight for it and go hard or else your going to loose and get hurt. What a tragedy...

This Is what I did @ 12am...

Sneeking out to see her. Wanting it more than ever. We get to the room. Taking off clothes. Till sweet kisses come from my lips to her's. Going down to her breasts. Making her moan. Feeling her body shake from my sweet kisses. Feeling what's on my tounge ; kissing, sucking, licking; just to hear her moan more and more. Her moaning is making me wanting to do it more and more addicted to it. Don't want her to stop. Shit this is what I have been waiting for. Her lips kissing on me making me plee please don't stop. My bodies calling her. And I want more. Her body over his is what I adore more. Finnishing up her legs are sqeezing me. It's like they are saying please don't leave. Now leading into the hard kissing of her neck as she pulls me towards her. Sweet moans comming from both of us. Leading one thing to another.... A knock on the door... The person telling us it's time for me to leave. Her looking down at me telling me she has never done this before... with anyone. In my head im saying baby me either........ And Damn it i still want more!

Going To Prom Saturday...

Im Going with my best friend Deron since the 1st grade!!

And really our prom doesn't have to be special or a big deal with everything looking perfect because he's not my boyfriend or girlfriend so to me every little detail does not have to be perfect.

And everyone is making a big deal out of it. And i just want them to chill it's not that serious... Really it is'nt

{that's the hair im going to have

the dress is exactly like that in the back same color and all}

I really Can't hear...

So im at work yesterday and one of my co-workers are reading their text messages and she's like what's a Bogo?

And knowing me being so gay in thought im thinking she is asking what is a Logo?

So im like oh its a LBGT channel... So she's like okay...(awkwardness)

then im like wait did you say Bogo? Like a sale for payless? She's like yeah
- Oh.....

Don't Judge me...

My Spring Break for me started on Tuesday.

It all began with me coming to school to drop off an assignment. Then i left school (skipping for the 1st time!!!) I mean more than half the school was there anyways so why would i stay...? But I had plans. Me and 3 of my friends went to CVS for our meeting place. 1st plan for skipping was to buy some condoms which was Trojan Deluxe Pack 14 in a box! (ahhh yes i will use those...I hope) Then we walked to the park to chill for a bit until one of my friends parents went to work. By that time i looked at my watch and it was 8:55 so i had to go. But my friends where trinna make me stay so we could smoke...(canabis..Lmao!) but i was like NO! this will be my first time smoking and i don't wanna be fucked up walking around the streets like some junkie high as hell. So we parted our ways....

....Must I add When I left that's when they got caught by an administrator and one of my friends parents. They had to go back to school and my friends phone is taken away... dang i was lucky.....

So I started walking and strategies which would be the best way to get to my friends house so we could smoke which was the 2ND plan for skipping. So I started walking to the movies, then i cut through some woods. Which was hella creepy. So I was like i hope i don't get abducted by some weird ass person that like pretty black girls... any ways i was walking through the woods i saw this path way i started fowling it and then i ended up right where i wanted to be!! By the library. That walk took 20 min's then another 10 min's to get to my friends house.

On the way to his house It was this Hispanic man in this tuck he looked like he was around 25 or so. So he's like hey you wanna ride :D. Im like no Im gud. But thanks for asking. And i hurried up and got across that street lol.

Then i reached my friends house around 9:30. Im like knocking on the door for like 5 min's and i don't have a cell phone so i couldn't call him. So i Started throwing rocks at his window. Then he came down stairs to open the door. He was fresh out the shower so i understand why he didn't hear the door.

So after he had some clothes on we got the cannabis out and started smoking.
At first i didn't feel anything but then after 3 min's i started trippin like Hell.
I was sitting on the couch and i was tring to lean forward but my head was heavy (yes that sounds hilarious but it really did) so my head kept going back into the couch. Then my friend is like get it together!! I was like My head is heavy and he started laughing at me. So i went to the kitchen where he was and my legs where hurting after all that walking. So sat on the counter. Then for some reason i stud up on the counter. And im looking at the stuff thats on top of his cabinets and i say "hey why are you guys hiding Heineken's and Budweiser's and sprite and Coke cola?"
Then he's like what are you talking about get down thats dangerous. So some how he carries me to the couch. And Im trinna explain to him how i feel (as in the high) So im like It feels like this force field is going in and out my body and my muscles are contracting everywhere. Then im like do you feel the same? He's like NO! lol i control my high.

After that we smoked some more cannabis this was called dirt. And it was great and I wasn't as crazy i was normal with a delay. So by that time it was like 12 something and my friend was talking to his girlfriend and for some reason she didn't sound cute..idk but she is...anyways she trinna come over so i was like lets meet her so i can get my 3rd plan of skipping out of the way (go to the Boyfriends house) so we started walking and she picked us up and dropped me off at his house.

At this point im a lil bit high but its controlled.
I ring the door bell. And my bf's dad was looking confused to why i was there. So apparently my boyfriend forgot that i was coming over. But it was all gud. I wasn't mad or pissed. So he was like Hey baby whats wrong? (<--concerned) I was like nothing Im fine. So he was like okay. Lets watch a movie. Cool.
So we sat there and was watching inkheart. Which was really good (even though i kinda don't remember)...

So i told him i was high. And he got mad like seriously mad. Im like chill. We talked about me smoking before and you said you dnt have problem with it. So he was like yeah but not being high at my house! So im like just chill your dad didn't even notice that something was up and Im not acing stupid so just chill. So he's all like we will talk about this later. So im like w/e ok.
We continued watching the movie.kuddling.making out all that good stuff.... So now im pretty much in the dog house and I tried talking to him about it later on that day. But he was pretty pissed and now it's Thursday !! and im kinda scared to call him i have a feeling he might break up with me... :'C

Ah im such an idiot!

Im fucking up!

What Mii Liife iiSues Got A JOB...!?!?!

HELL YEAH SHE DOES!!!

I GOT A
J O B
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ($6.85/hOUR GET PAYED ERR 2WEEKS YO... ((<--WOW LOL)))

$45 IN TIPs ADN ITS MY SECONDAY DAY OF WORKING

cAN YOU SAY
W O R D
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

aND IMMA BE WORKING SPRING BREAK TOO! (+WEEKENDS)

mONEY, mONEY, mONEY,
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
wHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

( =p )LEMME STOP RUBBiN iT iN YUR FACE ( =p )

bUT COME ViST ME @

aDVENTURE LaNDiNG
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IF YOUR IN
RaLEIGH.....

Friday the 27th...

Good day. Spent time with the bf. after he left. This girl called me up and said she wanted to kiss me... (peer pressure) So i was doing my best to say No! b/c thats cheating... But I said she could come over to hang. any-ways one thing lead to another touching, grabbing (basicly i almost got it :D) started kissing (neck,stomach,lips)like nobodies business.(it was kindas steamy :D).. And after that i was like ohhhhhh shit! if you tell someone im
Soooooooooo dening it! she agreed and said the same.

Great so that weekend we were inseperateble on the phone. Now im hella worried cuz she like's me a lot..... And i told her sorry, but i just can't do it. She said okay but she still gnna flirt with me... (mk??)

-I got my self in a problem


.... And today im still fucking up
April 1 2009 I had a merry ol' time with her again... lets just say boobies...!! :D

More Relationship iiSUES...

I feel that my bi-ness is getting in the way of my relationship with my bf. And I admit it it kinda hurts. I want and have him,, but I think he is getting the hunch that I want more than him. Which is kinda true but I don’t carry out my cheating actions. Now I feel horrible that he thinks about moving on. Damn. It’s like I’m torn between randam meaningless girls that I just want to fuck and him. This is like one of those moments I wish that I was straight. <--yeah that sounds like I’m hating who I am but I’m not! I just want to be true to him more than physically but more mentally which is the problem to start with. This shit is depressing.

Update!!

Hey World Good News.... I HAVE A j O b
$6.85
kinda suxz but its money by the hour and im cool with that.

What's NEw with me i bet you wanna know... uhm nothing really. Same ol' ish just a different day/month w/e...

Pretty boring... Mhm...

Shutting Down Myspace...And Facebook

Reason it seems that drama always comes from it....
But hey if any of yall wanna reach me check me on DL or aim

Oh another thing laptop is no more its shattered into pieces literally.

Great! Right! :D <--Sarcasm

Broken fate, Broken dreams….Emotions

I’m not really big with words so it’s kind of hard for me to explain how I feel right now. I feel a bit distressed and loss with no way out. Like a rat trapped in a cage thinking of the better days that I have had not feeling this way that I do. Wassup? Why am I ever satisfied? Is it because I settle for less? Is it because I know greatness is about to come? What ever it is I hope it gets fixed or comes forth. I hate feeling this way…. I feel that I wake up with another day another problem. Nothing to look forward to. Boyfriend yes. But I still feel alone. Yes I do know lots of people but do we click..? No. I rather be a loner than be with them. At least im happier. With no motive of getting up equal laziness. Laziness equals no money no joy. What a horrible sin. Ugh. Someone help me help me. I’m getting and going nowhere fast.

....My plans....My iiSUES

“Life is a struggle when you live in hell.”
-Your blogger

14 months to go till high school ends, and real life begins. I can smell the independence coming like the rain needed on a hot summer day. Oh yes it’s needed, indeed.

Plans After High School:
Wake Tech – Criminal Justice (2yrs)
Military – Naval Reserves (They pay for my schooling and I get paid also)
Job – wanting to at least make $12.00/hr to survive (So I might have two jobs… I got shit to buy!)
I should have enough money to get an apartment (rent $700+)
Granted income – $900 (b/c I just have it like that… As long as I stay in school)
Car insurance – You know what? I just might be that damn cheap that I won’t have it… (That shit is expensive!)

P.S

I know it’s going to be hard work and with a little bit of faith and lots of praying plus hope I should be good… But I’m up for the challenge. Because I’m Sick of the bullshit! My plans are realistic so it should work out.
I don’t understand why all of the misfortune falls on me. I mean shit I don’t start anything; I’m for ever nice and smiling on top of that. I give God praises. I never get in trouble with the police or in fights, school or anything horrendous of that matter. I don’t even sneak out or smoke weed (and EVERONE SMOKES), or live like an unruly teen. I’m practically in some ways a good girl!
Hopefully things will start ruling in my favor. It’s rediculas how shit happens to me and I just don’t understand how it comes about. Maybe it will get better and I will have success in the long run and all the people that have made my childhood a living hell will say “man I should have treated her right.” But any who enough of me rambling. Stay tune for more of Mii Liife iiSUES

Plans For Now:
Car by August!!!
Job – any where I can get it in. (shit I don’t care if I’m washing fucking toilets! ((eww)) Money is still green)
Continue to maintain healthy grades
Try to stay out of the house as much as possible! (I have noticed when I stick around some shit always happens)

So I’m scared for this chicks life!

She is soo beautiful inside and out when she came the US. She was on super model status and getting paid just about like one. We had a class together and we talked all the time (she’s straight) like last year in that math class. But then all of a sudden when I started seeing her again at my school she seemed a bit different. Not so super model-ish anymore. Not so skinny. Not so white girl-ish. She’s more “HOOD” now. “Omg” I said to myself. So I went up to her
Me-“Hey, wassup?”
Her-She says “oh nothing.”
Me-“Oh okay… You still modeling?”
Her-“kinda… I have to loose this booty.”
Me-“I’ve noticed lol…well I live right down the street… so we can work out.”

Her-“lol yeah that would be nice. But I’m smashing this Friday and I don’t wanna be just bones”

ME-“uhm… okay… So who you smashing is he cute?? Who is he??”

Her-“hell yeah. He’s a blood but im a crip so I can’t until I give my flag back.”

ME-“What? You Bang?? Omg. What happen? you was sucha good girl and your beautiful! Why? That’s dumb. You live in the suburbs! Please don’t let anyone mess up your face! Can you even fight?? I’m really concerned about you!”

Her-“I’m tired of the good girl thing. It happen when one of my friends asked me to be in the Bloods then for some dumb reason I got out because it was starting to get a lil bit out of control. Now I bang blue. But I think it’s stupid because all of my friends are bloods. And I can’t smash another gang member unless I’m in that gang.”

Me-“Wow….Well you should leave that alone and loose some weight and stop banging anything even if it means you have to move to start a new life. You of all people should not be doing this. You are too beautiful to get cut up or shot n die over anything or anyone! But on some real! Don’t let anyone fuck up your face! And all jokes aside don’t mess with any of it. ”

Her-“It’s hard not to. This is something I just can’t get out of. First drinking, drugs, now this I just can’t get out of it.”

ME-“You will get tired of it soon enough to the point that will really want you to wish you were never involved in it or even met the person that gave you the suggestion of being in a gang. Any time you wanna talk I will listen and try to help you. Okay? Just be good.”

Her-“Alright ill think about it. See yah”

Me-“ ii byeeeeee (with a hug and a smile)”

I’m seriously scared for her life. I really hope she rises above the influence of peoples false since of family and bad decisions. That shit can really kill her. And she is soo beautiful. I still don’t understand. I would never be in a gang. The only thing I can think of that is close to a gang that I would be in is the military. At least that shit is legal and safe to a certain extent.

Contenta con mi NOVIO!

I really appreciate my boyfriend. I really do. Among all of the things I complain about and think of getting with girls and even leading them on. I will never let him go. I love this guy. And I let him know that. Even though he thinks he isn’t that great he keeps me sane. And something to look forward

This Weekends party...

Can you say SUPA freak fest.

Nuf said


Moving on to the girl i was dancing with

Dude !!!
When she took off her shirt..(she still had a shirt on ((nothing happen))... Chill)
Her body made mine look like a weakling.
i needa get the ball rolling

YouTube...

So I got on youtube b/c I saw that My friend had a video posted in her blog of her doing her poetry thang.

I peeped it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1PxsFRuIXw

(watch it :D)

And i realized i haven't been on there in a LONG ASS MIN!
have 70+ videos but I just haven't been in the Vlogging mood.
This is more manageable. No Editing, or any of that time consuming mess.

So i'm thinking about deleting it

ehh. or maybe I will upload a video... someday?

So Today...

Half day

Went over bf's house to meet some of the fam.
His dad is very comical. Nice ppl.
His brother looks EXACTLY like him. Not so talkative.
His sister i see her like everyday so nothing special besides her room lol
his Dog growled at me. wass'nt feelin that.

Uhmm what else...

We watched movies and kinda went to sleep (my nap time around 2-3) and he kept me awake with kisses (sweet ikno)

I had fun

We talked about every single thing that was on my mind like EVERYTHING cheating to girls to us breaking up.
And I'm glad we had that talk b/c it saved our relationship :D (happy)

So My mind mow is on him and no otha... (Nice!)
can you believe it... prolly not

ur prolly saying
shoo the next girl she see's she gnna try n talk to her

and that may be the case
(dnt feel like explaining that^^)

and i will put a pic up to show y'all my wear

(yess yonni imma steal ur idea)

What’s up with the gay community at my school?

So this one time I had this incident with this chicka that I was pursuing at the time. But come to find out that she is a bitch and she feeds on drama. So we had a falling out and now we don’t talk.

So why is it when I try to talk to another girl at my school they just freakishly know the girl that I had problems with her and on top of that know the whole story? Like WTF.

I have a problem with that. That just kinda erks me a little bit b/c now when I wanna talk to a chick they will gnna bring up that situation. And I don’t like drama or getting angry with a person especially with her. It's not worth it and It’s just TOO MUCH.

About that Dominican Girl (Super Smile :D)

Shit I can’t start nothing with her sexy self (ahh man she sexy she got that imam gnna whip you until you moan kinda look… like cat woman :D) But the main point is I was talking with my bf about her since he is pretty good friends with her and we BOTH wanna do her lol. I can’t do anything cuz he is ON to me and knows something is up.

Oh and get this
He’s jealous…. (NiCe!)
So he does care about our relationship!
Even better! (<--That can mean MANY things)

Nice..Frustration...

When i get on the computer I immediately check myspace, facebook, downelink, AIM/email, and bloggs to see what's new.
(random^)

So I have applied to :

1)Food lion (and went to job fair)
2)Bed, Bath. & beyond
3)Cold Stone
4)Party City
5)Justice
6)Quiznos
7)2 Targets
8)Dollar General
9)Family Dollar
10)Dots
11)Pac Sun
12)Champs
13)Foot Locker
14)Wendy's
15)Life Way Christian Store
16)Panera Bread
17)The Fish Room
And NO ONE is HIRING!!!

Even typed up a nice resume as shown below:

Attributes: A quick learner and always eager to learn something new. Great team player and get along well with others. Also I am Motivated and Flexible.

WORK EXPERIENCE:
Café Kado
5311 S Miami Blvd
Durham, NC 27703
Telephone: (919) 941-9040

Title: Cashier/Customer Assistant/Inventory/Cook/Clean-Up
Responsibilities: Greeted and assisted customers through cash register sales by issuing receipts, refunds, credits or change. Answered customer’s questions about the different products that were offered. Responsible for maintaining stock and housekeeping of the store. Gained experience working with various coffee machines in the store.

iFantaic, LLC
105 Shalon Ct,
Apex, NC 27502
Telephone: (919) 387-6062

Title: Warehouse Inventory/Customer Assistant/Cashier/Computer Apps With Microsoft Excel
Responsibilities: Assisted Customers with purchasing iPod accessories. Created a spreadsheet for inventory in the warehouse to make sure an accurate count of inventory was maintained. Bag, box, or wrap merchandise and prepare packages for shipment. Maintained clean and orderly warehouse areas.

VOLUNTEER WORK:
Retreat Hospital
2621 Grove Avenue
Richmond, VA 23220.
Telephone: (804) 254-5100

Responsibilities:
Helped with passing out medication to patients. Assisted patients with moving around the Hospital, by pushing wheel chairs.





Ah man
iPRAY THAT I GET A JOB!

Or magically the places I applied for openings just appear out of nowhere!

OMG!!! The HOTTEST DOMINICAN CHICK IS...

YESSSS!
Man you just don't know Every since my sophomore year i've been wanting to get with that. OMG!

(picture is of a bi sexual flag)

My Relationship iSSUES

What’s the purpose of a relationship?
I mean you start to love the person but they take it for granted. In saying that you show them too much love.
Are we on the same page?
I don’t think so
I thought the purpose of a relationship was to show that you care for the person (that’s just me)

I don’t think this relationship will last long.
All I want is to be loved and to be happy.
Why is this so hard?
Why is he making this so complicated?

What am I asking for out of this relationship?
Guys are so hard to understand

Relationships make you vulnerable to the ones you love because you are just hoping that someone you truly care about can hear your problems and make them better.

Why do I bother?
Relationships never make things better
You are always hoping and doing things to make a person stay. This never helps in the long run. That shit hurts like hell when they leave.
Then you are left looking stupid because you put all your time, effort, energy, memories in a person you value for them to leave you.

I’m writing all of this because I am about to have a broken heart and it hurts to think of this.
But not yet there is still hope.

Idk. I guess I have to revaluate myself. To make this better.

(No there is no need to talk about this. You just might see me cry…)

- A distressed heart on the brink of breaking

Perfect Snow Day to COMPLETE my AGENDA..

So woke up happy because the my agenda was about to be complete.
Got the phone. Started to dial her number.... Then I started thinking... I can't do this to him I'm supposed to Love this guy ? And for me thinking about cheating on him is not love thats a slap in the face a betrayal of what we have.
So i put the phone down and called my cuz instead

Yes my consciousness got to me.... yes i have a soft heart

And I have come to realize I have a good thing going so why mess it up.

Main Agenda For The WEEK is to...

Get some pussy!
Yes I said it. I'm gomma get some this week!

like on some ASAP shit
And yes my concience is gonna be fucked up because I will be cheating.
But hey this is my own seperate needs.
So I guess it's okay.

You know what the funniest part about this is...?
She's white LOl
yes I know.
And if you know me. You know that I don't really like them like that. But this one... Is reall nice =D

Im OD Super Excited (OMG!)

Help ME Understand

Wassup with pornos with two chicks having sex with a dilldo
then they wanna give the Dilldo head like bitch it's plastic/foam/NOT real!!
(at this point I'm NOT turned on anymore)

Help me understand what's the purpose of sucking it???




-I tagged random ppl
so just comment


(and ikno! im not the only one that looks at porn... So dnt be like eww n shit so Be real n comment)

Piercing's I want to get

-Belly Botton
&
-Nipples
- hey ppl that does not mean that imma be on girls gone wild showing everyone my boobs.

Omg What the Fuck....

Omg what the fuck is wrong with me. Like really I’m fucking
up. It’s already bad enough that my boyfriend is younger than me. So our
thinking level is one notch different. And my ass started thinking and talking
about how our relationship is going. This guy is all like great :D! (Then he
states his reasons..)

After that he starts’ asking me about if you have a crush
on someone is it cheating. And of course I’m like no its not. (cuz I know my
damn self has crushes on many girls)

Then of course I’m like why do you ask? He’s like he thinks
this white girl (OMG!!


[A1] Not
again) is interesting.

I’m like okay…

Then he’s like you got to meet her. {Just adding on: And he
says this like imam going to find her attractive like wtf no… well maybe idk…?}
(I’m my mind I’m like hellz NO might have to kill the bitch) So I’m like yeah
sure… ( :-/ mhm why not…?)

Then the conversation went on to different subjects

Blah

Blah

Blah… and so on….

Then he says “I don’t like thinking about how’s a
relationship is going because it stays in my head too much and then it just does
not go right.”

(Oh My Fucking Jesus) If I would have just talked about
this with one of my best friends preferably Deron (3^rd on myspace
top) I wouldn’t have this fucking guy thinking about the worst of situations
between me and him.

I’m such an Idiot. I swear I always fucking do something
wrong to cause a trickle of catastrophe in relationships.

Well now all I can do is CONTINUE to pray for a stronger
relationship between me and him (like I do EVERYDAY) because he actually means
the mundo to me! (Despite my wondering eye). ß
That’s a family curse – wondering eye!

Next time I think about shit with me and him imam just keep
my emotions to myself (even though that shit kills me) It’s for the bettering of
our relationship…. What do you think?

---

[A1]So
this guy is stuck on this girl he went out with for a long ass time before
me. So he has a thing for white girls… (He just need to stay with Blacks
or Hispanics in my opinion preferably ME!)

Me complaining...

I really don't like it when someone is attracted to me and they are not attractive no better word not cute. Don't get me wrong... Im still going to be nice to the person b/c thats just how I am. But i don't like it when ppl come up to me and they know that they are not cute and i mean they know they not it's self evident and they still trinna talk to me. Yes, I am bothered. They wont know that. But they might just take the hint when I'm NOT trinna flirt with the person...

(yes this did happen to me today)

This MutherFucker...Ughhh! (Frustration to the MAX)

My day started off AWESOME I had plans to meet up with friends do some stuff... Because we had a HALF DAY! (woo-woo).
Well when I came home that didn't work out as planed. But it was okay because I asked my boyfriend to came over and he did (YAY!).
So we chilled and do what we usually do... Then he left and I was feeling good as hell. Then I decided I wanted to do chores n homework and all that other good stuff. Again I was really really really HAPPY.

Then the phone rings. It was my dads girlfriend... I mean she called like all day like at least 3x. Bt I didn't want to answer because I didn't want her asking me 50,000,000 questions about what why we had a half day.
So i answered the phone. This bitch (yes i had to say it) is all like you need to go send out those job applications and stop sleeping all day. (She thinks she knows things about me btw) And I said Sherry Im not sleeping all day and I'm waiting on my recommendations so I can get the jobs I applied for (irked at this moment). Then this bitch is trinna tell ME!!!! that I don't need recommendations. Then I'm like look... I really want these jobs soo... I am getting recommendations so I can be even more qualified for the positions. Then she's all like well you need to get them by friday because they been laying around for a while (got these applications last weekend btw weekends are my free time btw and I have no transportation until the weekend) Oh another thing. Then this BITCH is like oh and you need to clean the kitchen. Im like I already did it and I can't rush people to give me stuff and they are busy themselves; So when ever they give me MY RECOMMENDATIONS thats when I will get them. Bye (phone is hung up)

Then im really mad cuz she trinna act like she got half of her DNA in me but she DOES NOT she is the GIRLFRIEND (so get off my shit)
And another thing Im getting a JOB because I WANT TO!
not because I HAVE TO
I have no responsibilities like :
KIDs...
CAR NOTE...
INSURANCE...
TUITION...
BILLS...

I am still a MINOR untill a year from now

So don't be trinna HARASS ME to get a fucking JOB again this BITCH is NOT MY MOTHER! and has NO DNA of MINE we ARE NOT RELATED! (so why she think she has the RIGHT to tell me wtf to do...?)

Another thing Im getting a job because I WANT ONE. NOT BECAUSE I HAVE TO!

(i don't even ask her for ANYthing! Again she is NOT MY MOTHER NOR GUARDIAN NOR ANY RELATION TO MEEE! )

And another thing we are in a Recession and they ALREADY told me that they had ALOT of applicants so... I MIGHT NOT EVEN GET THE DAMN JOB! (shit I'm really STRESSED the fuck out)

Im addicted to sex...

I've just figured this out. Monthly I have to get some of something at least 9x. And if I don't I will fantasize about every person I want to have sex with in various ways. Omg just me thinking about it makes me want it even more. Well lemme stop typing before things get hot n heavy....

:D
(I'm innocent)

This Really Annoys me!

My first big move was to North Carolina when I was just
starting high school. Leaving my friends behind I had to find new acquaintances
to hang with during school hours at Apex high. Then as the year went on problems
just had to stir up, leaving my external family in dysfunction. So I went on to
continue my wonderful life on to Raleigh, NC which at first was a bit rocky but
then began to smooth out little by little when I began to attend Millbrook high
school. There I met some crazy ass chicks that didn’t work out as girl friends.
However some how I lead my way to meet a guy named Josh from Cali. He was(is)
soo chill, calm, quite, smart, played(s) soccer, and Mexican/black mixed which
is pretty much all of what I like. So as months went on to weeks and our
friendship grew more into a more relationship we started to call ourselves a
couple. During this relationship we have had been through lots of things
together trust, breakups, getting back together, sex, minor drama basically all
of the things you could ever go through in a long term relationship. Now that
Josh and I are still doing well I don’t need another freaking “something” to
come along and screw up my plans for a stable normal high school life (LMAO! YES
I was pissed off in that sentence). But as always nothing goes as planed for me,
today I got in the mail a Re-Assignment Letter saying that next year I will NOT
be going to Millbrook, and for my graduating year 2010 I will be going to
WAKEFEILD. It seems to be everyone else in my
neighborhood as well. I mean my boyfriend lives in my neighborhood but like down
the street. He might have got re assigned to another school. I just want to be
where ever he is. It’s going to be hard to go out with a person that does not go
to your school but y’all still date. And I NEED my daily KISSES! (<that’s what
I’m really concerned about)

 On another point I’m a fucking Junior! I can’t call
WAKEFEILD MY SCHOOL because it’s NOT! Quiet frankly I can’t call any of
the schools I’ve been too in NC MY SCHOOL because I haven’t stuck around long
enough to enjoy that label. All I want is to have Wake County Leave my School
just the way it is. (So I can enjoy my baby each and everyday besides him coming
to my house [–Besos a Joshito.- Imma miss him if he’s not where I’m am]) Even
though Millbrook is:

COLD (and still have the a/c on) ,

MUDDY (when you are walking to the
PODS/Trailers outside),

And has:

LAME ass ADMENISTRATORS that make up stupid rules (like no
hats, bandanas, beads b/c it might be gang related)

Teachers that are on some type of CRACK! (Basically some
teachers need to ask themselves would they even do the homework/projects they
assign students)

 

 

'Call Me When You Get This 5:05 Corinne Baley Rae Corinne
Baley Rae R&B/Soul 8 2/5/2009 6:00 AM

'Call Me When You Get This 5:05 Corinne Baley Rae Corinne Baley Rae R&B/Soul 8
2/5/2009 6:00 AM

 

 

Oh and DO NOT!! GET ME STARTED ON THE SENIOR PROJECT!!!
BULLSHIT

OMG COME ON!!  IM JUST TRING TO GRADUATE!! OMG. Its already
hard as it is to get in a damn collage

In the Moment

I love my dad
i mean he's such a good guy (tht has wrong female choses)
but over all im glad he is my dad (even though he can be a big asshole :D)

Closing!

 

Lust is something that can test your relationship to the
MAX but if you ignore it things will be far
better in the end. Also I have learned that.

-        
Lesson Learned :D

Not sure what to tittle this...

Oooooh My God it’s nothing like a girls
MOAN! Especially if you
like her…

Between lust

Between lust
vs. what
I have

 

I have a hard decision to make

I haven’t acted on the cheating part
(yet) but I mean (aghhh)
maybe it wouldn’t be soo hard if I wasn’t horny all the damn time when
I’m around her. I do actually try to avoid her as much as possible. We
know the same people so it’s kind of hard to avoid my friends. When my
friends are not the problem it’s kind of her… Being in the
“circle” of friends that I hang with.

I’m really not trying to cheat on my
boyfriend it’s just that my body/mind desires her and I can’t help that… I just
can’t.

 

2nd Part to bad grades

2^nd Part to bad grades

 

My Report Card wasn’t bad as I thought it was. Actually I
did a little bit better (just a lil bit though).
After I showed him the news he acknowledged (he basicly slayed the hell outta me)that I’m not going to a four year
university because my grades show that I’ am not. I guess I’m cool with that but
I mean that does not mean that I am not going to amount to anything it just
means that I’m not going to a university. (I’m going to
Community Collage as well) But I will tell you that I’m going to the
military because I actually want too! Not because I have nothing else to do
(I do have other options). This is because I want
to keep that tradition going. The military helps you be determine in what ever
your goals may be also you get a phat ass check after all your hard work for
serving your country. Plus I will be proud of accomplishing that.
In the long run my dad said he was proud of me for having a plan for my future.(Instead of being a bum, Which is SOO not me!)

Don’t let others choke your dreams or hold you back

Don’t let others choke your dreams or hold you back

I’m making a video blog about this topic because not too long ago I was having a conversation with my boy friend about what I want to do after high school and what he was going to do. Anyways (not to cause confusion or conflict with my boy friend); I stated that I wanted to go to the Navy. He said that he didn’t want me to go to the military; because he can’t be away from me for along time and he was afraid of me finding someone better than him and so on and so on.

I’m over here trying to tell him we would still be together and all that good stuff. But in my mind I’m just like damn nicca… Shit I don’t need someone holding me back from doing the things I want to do.

I certainly wouldn’t do that to him. If I was that worried I would try to go to myself. (We will see how this works out in the future)

Even when it comes to relationships, family, or friends don’t let them hold you back you do you and follow your heart!

(I'm going to youtube this)

You tell me if I should feel the slightest negative emotion to this...

You tell me if I should feel the slightest negative emotion
to this…

 

So my blood sister found me on Myspace this summer, and I
am happy she did!

And my father and her are developing a beautiful
relationship which I think all fathers/parents should do with there children
even if you don’t know them personality wise or haven’t seen them. It’s just the
fact you the parent/father knowing that you help make something come into this
world that is part of you. Now getting to the real point of this blog my
biological mother not trying to slay her in anyway I’m just saying/wondering do
you have the desire of knowing me? Like how my father is getting to know my
sister your daughter. Do you want anything to do with me? I mean shit. This is
actually hurting me emotionally and I’m a pretty strong person inside n out.
It’s just the fact of you know my number, you know my AIM IM, and you can damn
sure ask my sister how to contact me in other ways such as Myspace & Facebook.
Like damn you have every place where I’m at 99% of the time. So what is the
problem? Why haven’t you taken your time out to chat with me or at least wish me
happy birthday? Or you might be scared of my criticism. Shit I’m not mad at you
for not being in my life since birth. All I’m saying is now would be a good time
to get to know your daughter. Yes it might be a lil bit awkward talking to me
because you don’t know me, but that will all past.

 

However the thing that really got me thinking about this
was having a conversation with my boyfriend. I was talking about how my dad was
getting her for Christmas an(a) iPod, laptop, camera, printer iTunes cards and
anything else she might want (and he got it for her).

 

(Just to let you know I’m not
looking for gifts from this woman because as you can see my dad can most
certainly give me material cosas)

 

So my boyfriend
was saying-

So your dad and
your sister must talk a lot. And I’m like yeah they do!

So he’s like-

Do ya’ll talk a
lot? (he’s talking about me and my biological mother) I’m like no we don’t
at all. I’m not sure why.

He’s like-

Do you like
her? I’m like I have no reason not to like her she’s cool in my book

He’s like-

Oh ok…. I think
that’s messed up how she not trying to put forth an effort to have a mother
daughter relationship with you, but that’s just me I don’t know about you though
that’s what I think about that.

(And I tried to play it off like It really didn’t bother me that me and her
don’t speak but it did and still does)
=/

And that really got me thinking I talk to my sister just
about everyday! And you are a parent/mother that lives with someone that talks
to your daughter everyday and you can’t slip in a hey… how you doing. I agree
with my boyfriend this/that is a problem!.

This chick has got me gone (lustily)

Every since I met her in my weight training class I have always been attracted to her. To the flirting to her physical appearance the chemistry is their. So let me get to the chase I asked her out… on a dat e… Yes I am very much aware that I have a boyfriend. My thing is you only live once so why not chase what you desire…right? So I asked her out on a date she said “What about your boyfriend?” I said you didn’t answer yes or no. Ignoring the total fact of her asking me “what about my boyfriend” question (yes that was smooth but I’m trying to get what I want) and I am anticipating her reply. I really hope it’s in my favor!

(Crown Royal- Jill Scott)

The Softest Lips…Part One

I don’t know what I am getting into.
Even though I have a boyfriend I feel like I’m missing out on things I truly want to do.
This sounds fucked up but I really don’t want to break up with him for any other person and that is my word. But I have realized that I will step out on him to get what I want and still remain with him. Sounds crazy I know and dishonest. It’s just that my mind and body is drawing me to her. Plus it doesn’t help that she is feeling me back. People if you only knew what she does to me she would have you going too (basically she can get it). I am contemplating my decision and I will make a part two of what I am going to do. Until then stay tuned.

Frustrating.. Valentines Day

ugh!!
I tried to order a key chain heart engraved with names on each heart (sounds great right) well!
When I tried to order it the fucking site wanted to act up!

Now I have to go to a store to find something! Which i really do NOT want to do since heart engraved thing is something i REALLY
want to get my bf for Valentines day.


Help Me with New Gift Ideas!!!!

PLEASE!

Man WTF...

This up comming Report Card is going to be HORRIBLE
I mean all "D's"
(I even got bad grades in easy classes)

Yeah I bet you can see me sweating through the computer now!!

Idk what imma tell my dad what happen
Geesh please give me advice and pray for me!!

Realization

So since I’ve had this Bloger or Blogspot I have had a lot of things to say!
I find this amazing how I can write full fledged pages if I truly wanted to. You know why? I can do this because, I can freely write about stuff that I actually want to write about. I like it better this way because there are no rules that I have to fallow rubrics or guidelines which makes it nerve racking to get your ideas out on the paper and your ideas to others like you would like to depict them to be.

I think my school should have a free writing class. Even though I’m not a skilled writer one day I will like to be but now I just simply like to write what ever I want to express.

Places I Want To Visit

1. Berlin (live)
- I have heard it’s very cheap to live there also they have cool things that I am attracted to as in music people and culture
2. California (live)
- Is basically the capital of gayness duh also night life party seen is great! (Has a warm climate) But very expensive to live there.
3. D.C (live)
- It’s close to my home town Richmond , VA also love the music & culture of the people. Gay seen is nice too!
4. India (visit)
-Different religions of India attract me to learn about them so why not go to learn about the religions
5. New Zealand (live)
- It’s beautiful and it would be a nice place for great relaxation (low stress)
6. Australia (live)
-Peaceful place plus beauty and low stress
7. Puerto Rico (visit/live)
- Culture, beautiful people, great food, just an awesome place

Realistic Media

As I log into my Microsoft word and write another thing about my life experience I have realized that the Media has a great effect on how we think and portray others. I know the media has a big impact on me as a young adult. To the Real World and to Daddy’s Lil Girls and everything else in between. My problem with the things on MTV are so unrealistic for average young people to have fame or to own there own shoe company with the help of your famous uncle. Yes you can say that I am a bit jealous or peeved that I don’t have those types of connections. All I’m saying is can we have a show on MTV having kids doing real life jobs and the struggles we go through. (I guess that is what the show Real Life is for.) Instead of showing us young people false hope of fame and richness being handed to you. I know when I turn 18 and out of high school I have a decision to make with jobs which I am going to have to work very hard to get so I can be successful, and it’s not going to be handed to me. So let’s just have realistic Media.

More Sappy stuff..

When I'm away from him (bf) I think about un-needed things like all of the worse things that could happen in a relationship.

I mean just can't help it.
I can't get my mind off of it.

why do think about the worst when I know we are doin well/good?

Ehh! I needa see my baby ;*

The thing that Depresses me the most is...

My dad not letting me live life!
Its not like I ask him can I do crazy shit like stay out all night till 5am or spend a night over my boyfriends house or go drinking and driving. Nope none of that is in my intrest. I want to do is vist a freaking collage and see if I like the damn thing shit!

Can I see what I want for myself!
I will never know what it is like untill I go.
Can he just stop holding my hand like im a little child. I mean MAN Come on! Im 17 and I think your susposed to vist collages if you want to, especially if you have chance of going there!

And its in the same freaking state.

I wish he'd stop being soo over protective!

(*help & advice is needed*)

Its all in the eyes..

So everyday like I always do I talk to my bus Buddie Ellianna (sp* on the name). SO this particular day she asks me if I'm stressed and I'm like yeah I am. (I'm thinking to myself, I wasn't showing that I was... How did she know? I mean I was doing the usual joking and acting goofy like I always do. So I was quite surprised that she noticed that.) I then asked her how did she know that I was stressed. She said that she could see it in my eyes. That really had me thinking you can't really hide your emotions with everyone, even if you are good at it. Cuz I am good at hiding emotions and she picked up on it like dust on the TV.

Hmm its all in the eyes...

SO!! THE BIRTHDAY!! JAN 12 :D

YESSSS!!

Im 17

and I'm almost legal

Even though i never do much for my bday

next year im going all OUT
I mean
-STRiiP CLUBz
-SEXY PEOPLE
-I mean im gnna have a WILDCRAZYTIME !!!

Also thts the year I graduate

2010!!!

Be on the look out cuz im starting to plan NOW!!!

What is love?

What is love?
Is it the fluttering in your stomach when you see his face?
Is love..
Smelling your sent at any giving random time?
Is love..
Making future plans to be together because we can see ourselves together?
Is love…
Can’t wait to be in your arms?
What is love?
I think I’m feeling this thing called “love”
Or am I just merely sprung off you?
What ever it is I don't want this feeling to ever go away

I write sappy crap like this when I’m on the monthly...

I want to see what is truly in your heart
I want to believe that we will never be apart
I know this will be a long walk but
Just help me believe in you in me
I believe do you; really believe?

Just thinking about the future vs. Reasons why I shouldn’t be a mothe

Just thinking about the future


We have had this discussion many times about me and him having kids, and many of those times I have said No; other times I have taken it into consideration maybe one or two it really depends on what is going in our lives. I have come to realize when you are in a committed relationship there are things that you will have to give up or make changes for the person you want to spend your life with. With saying that, someone is going to have to compromise with having kids or not having them...





Reasons why I shouldn’t be a mother

Major reason..
-I was traumatized as a kid
From that horrible experience this has left me a mean, cold hearted, selfish, depressed, just a mentally jacked up person!
Yes this how I feel and I would not put another person through my horrible experience as a child.

You see this is how I look at it being a parent is for bettering a child’s future and me with all my mental flaws will not do that very thing. It will only make more jacked up kids like me.

So I guess im better off not being a mother just a LOVER to some gender!

(*Also me being a bisexual & I just find it terrifying having kids)

....

I feel like I’m taking the initiative of searching all the ways to be independent and to be successful. And at the end of the day I’m still in the beginning and not going anywhere…

Ahhuhhhhhh!! I fucking hate fucking PMS!

All the emotions that come out of nowhere!
I swear every time monthly I always have to fight back emotions. These unwanted emotions always causes problems. It’s like your period is taking over you! Talking, and even making decisions for you! Ehhh! This is one part about being a girl that I don’t like.
Hmm… PMS?
Like wtf do this come from? Is it like some hormonal chemical? Don’t they have a pill for PMS?
I mean they have a pill for everything else.

In LOVE with two..

Could it be possible to be in love with two people?
I am. Im soo confused. Her passion his charm. I can't only pick one.
Leaving one hurt will only take out the best in me.
I wish this could be easier to choose which one; to continue, to be true to or be true with two.
only time will tell.
(old wrote this in oh8 just edited it)